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| Downtown Miami |
Welcome to Miami's Cuban underverse and some.
The City of Miami is the heart of a county, namely Miami-Dade County. Thirty four "cities" make up this human conglomerate located just a few blocks South of the United States of America. It sits in between Broward and Monroe counties splitting mainland from the Florida Keys.
Miami-Dade can be easily spotted, firstly, because one of the 34 cities or whatever they are happens to be, precisely, Miami and, secondly, because Miami itself and most of the surrounding areas, mostly exuberant Hialeah and neighboring hoods, are inhabited by a gracious human breed called los cubanos!
Los cubanos
Once upon a time, los cubanos, in Florida's native language the Cubans, left Cuba, an island down South where time stopped ticking some time ago, and they've been coming ever since. They had been kicked out of their roaming quarters by a lunatic called Castro, the king, who didn't like rich people or anyone else, for that matter, except himself.
At first, Cubans came by plane and brought with them mucho money; later they were forced to be more creative and started arriving in practically anything that floats, thus los balseros were born.
The first Cuban conquerors were soon catapulted to the very top of the local food chain. Upon arrival, the Cubans changed cartography forever and adapted geography to accommodate their colorful street names; entire neighborhoods were re-branded accordingly, tropical music mercilessly imposed its will, and Spanish became a must. This first avalanche also took over politics by storm. In time, they became el exilio histórico, a social class almost extincted by now.
The newcomers were not a happy bunch. And, I don't blame them for they'd been deprived of anything dear to them. Consequently, their resentment translated almost immediately into action turning the new enclave into a virtual political battlefield against their demoniac enemy, that lunatic I mentioned above. Sadly, whatever they've done hasn't worked and King Castro will happily die of natural causes.
Cubans changed once and for all whatever idea the locals may have had about human coexistence, customs, and even alimentary habits.
Los cubanos brought with them pastelitos andcroquetas, café con leche and pan con mantequilla, made the We speak English sign a fancy anachronism in an English-speaking nation, and invented the efficiency, a real estate form of property unheard of anywhere else on Planet Earth unless there is, at least, one of them lurking around.
Cubans introduced South Florida natives to a whole different way of human interaction, too. Although the pioneers stayed faithful to commonly accepted standards of communication, for one, later waves changed that for good. Stridency and shouting became the new standards of conversation, the griteria was soon institutionalized; que bolá substituted ancient greeting forms for any time of day or night; employers, services, and businesses soon added por la izquierda to their code of conduct or misconduct depending on how you understand ethics, and dominoes became the utmost social gathering.
All that said, los cubanos carry the sole responsibility of having turned an otherwise mosquito paradise into a colorful destination. Their unique way of talking to each other, loud and, generally, an extraordinary showcase of body language, can't be replicated no matter how hard you try; their pastelitos de guayaba, puerco asado, frijoles negros and fresh pan cubano are a must, let alone the Cuban sandwich; salsa infuses the necessary energy to the daily commute, and the natural friendliness of any natural born Cuban makes it a breeze to find your way around town.
Cubans aside, Miami-Dade can certainly be a daunting place all by itself.
For one, it is not easy to understand how come 34 cities peacefully co-exist in such a relatively small chunk of land. The residents themselves don't even know they actually exist. So, as a visitor, you don't have to feel ashamed if you don't know that, either.
For most around here, this is Miami and will always be. Period. Yet, the cities are really there. Some cities!
One of them was made up out of thin air to please 86 of the one-percenters; another one popped out of nowhere because of a dispute about horses which are long gone although the "city" somehow survived for the politician's delight; some isles named Sunny could be easily re-branded Shady or, who knows, maybe Moscow; Florida City, the southern most enclave before hitting the keys is not precisely famous for its strategic location but its funny ways of counting money; Sweetwater has absolutely nothing to do with water let alone sweetness, the founding midgets are long gone and politics are as shady or even shadier than in those isles I mentioned above; a mall by the name of Aventura Mall is the only landmark in the city of ...Aventura, and Opalocka up North, well, that's Opalocka, stay far away.
Some place called North Miami Beach exists, too. Funny, though, there no beaches there and trying to figure out how and who came up with the idea of "building" a city that doesn't make any sense geographically may prove too tough to handle for a regular human being.
And, there's Homestead way down South with its wineries and superb food as long as you stay away from the big chains and settle for more local venues. There's a whole bunch of peacocks, too.
w.dominguez
References
- This commentary first appeared in www.thinkbucket.us/
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